Well Jed, if we're stuck with you, you gotta do something

His four-year plan has turned to crap, he'd better have a fiifth (even if it's just to drink)

Well Jed, if we're stuck with you, you gotta do something

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The Cubs enjoyed an off day yesterday and now face a gauntlet of seven games in six days against the Orioles and Cardinals before all of them but Shōta wander off in myriad directions for the All-Star Break. The Cubs are 42-49 and dead ass last in the woeful NL Central Division. Last year after 91 games the Cubs were a whopping 43-48. (So much better.) And they were poised to go on a hot streak where they went 10-5 before the trade deadline, which convinced President of Handing Out No Trade Clauses Willy Nilly Jed Hoyer to not sell, but instead really go for it with trades for superstars like Jeimer Candelario and Jose Cuas.

That whole paragraph is just so sad, isn’t it? Did they really think playing .667 baseball for a week and a half was the difference between giving up and half-assedly trying to win? I guess they did.

Last year, those Cubs continued to play solid baseball for five more weeks, and when they swept the Giants at home in a series that ended on September 6 they were 12 games over .500 and closer to the top wild card spot (1.5 games behind the Phillies) than they were to the final wild card spot (2.5 games over the Marlins.) Oh, those were the salad days my friends. They had seven games in ten days against the Diamondbacks and just going 3-4 in those games would have kept the D’bags at arm’s reach and most likely wrapped up a playoff spot. But, not only did the Cubs go 1-6 in those games, in the middle they somehow lost two of three to the Rockies.

One of the losses in the series in Phoenix got away from the Cubs in extra innings when Dansby Swanson didn’t seem to realize you can catch a ball in the air for an out, even after it hits your pitcher in the ass.

The Cubs limped home with a 7-15 record over their final 22 games and missed the playoffs by two games. They finished one game behind Arizona, but because the D’bags won the season series the Cubs needed to finish a game ahead of them to get the final wild card spot.

So, since September 6 of last year, the Cubs are a whopping 50-65 (.435).

Which brings us to today’s installment of, “Hey Jed. What is it you’d say you do here?”