Hey Jed, you can't be done
The Cubs sure smell like an 83 win roster again



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The Cubs are busy prepping for the return of Sammy Sosa a week from Friday night when our old buddy makes his grand return from the strange exile he was subjected to during the first 15 years of Ricketts ownership of the Cubs. That’s sure to be the highlight of the long since shark jumped Cubs Convention, but there’s still time for Jed to change that narrative.
Yes, a bonafide star player on the actual current roster will also be introduced, and Cubs fans need to be made to understand just what a great player Kyle Tucker is before he inevitably leaves for the Mets or Yankees in 10 months.
But the reason the Sammy thing is generating more excitement than the acquisition of an actual impact player is that Jed has done fuck all with the rest of his offseason moves.
Unless some of this gets you all tingly in your underwear:
- 29-year-old soft tossing righthanded reliever Eli Morgan
- 30-year-old catcher Carson Kelly and his career 86 OPS+
- 34-year-old lefty starter Matthew Boyd who has pitched 123 innings total in the last three seasons
- 38!-year-old lefty reliever Caleb Theilbar who posted a 5.32 ERA for the Twins last year along with career highs in hits per nine innings (9.5) and walks per nine (4.6)
- 30-year-old righthander Cody Poteet who has pitched 83 big league innings in his career
- 27-year-old utility infielder Vidal Brujan who has a career OPS+ of 49 in parts of four big league seasons
But hey, they’re not done yet. Rumors have them talking to former White Sox third baseman Yoan Moncada. Yoan is a switch hitter who in the 2019 and 2021 seasons combined was a 9.2 WAR player. And has been worth a total of 1.9 WAR in the three seasons since. He has missed 278 games in the last three seasons.
Well, at least he’s well rested.