We found something else Matt Shaw's really bad at

There is an outcry among a growing number of Cubs' fans for the team to trade their young third baseman, Matt Shaw, because in his real life he's a right-wing turd who associates with some of the most awful people in American politics and America in general.

To those fans, I have a simple question.

Have you ever met the Cubs' "owners?"

Shaw gave an earnest, cloying and mostly really dull 20 minute speech at last weekend's Turning Point USA hate festival. He spoke openly of his faith and what he seems to think is his very unique origin story of becoming a big league baseball player.

"I want to talk about my experiences, and how I am in the position I am in today," Shaw said while apparently supervising a group nap time at the event. "So, for a long time in my life, I wanted to be a professional baseball player. And that started from when I was a really young kid, and I worked hard, and I grinded through. You know, played high school, college, and then eventually made my way to professional baseball. And during that time, I read a lot of books..."

Do you think he's read The Immortals or Great Until It Wasn't? Probably not, they weren't on sale then. But they are now!

Anyway, you know what? That's as far as I could make it through this video. He's a terrible public speaker, and I have zero interest in what he has to say about...anything, really. I mean, unless he wants to talk about what he's doing this offseason to fix pretty much all of this:

Well, I guess he ran fast at least.

If, within the first 90 seconds of your big speech you try to wow the crowd by telling them you became a professional athlete by wanting to to do it as a kid, and reading some books, I have very little faith that the next 18 minutes aren't excruciatingly dull and dumb.

Here's the speech if you want to watch it. I can't imagine why you would.

Do you think he did seven minutes on why soup doesn't count as a meal?

Shaw's name hasn't been in trade rumors, but there have been rumors about the Cubs actively looking for someone else to play the position he played last year. Whether that would move him to the bench as a utility player, or if the Cubs would then trade a far better player, Nico Hoerner to avoid paying him his below market salary for 2026, I have no idea. Well, I mean I guess I do have that idea.