Mission Accomplished
The Baseball Ops team does its victory lap for marginally improving their team
The only full day of the Cubs Convention always kicks off with the Baseball Operations Update. It used to be time for Jim Hendry to show how hung over he was from the night before, then Theo Epstein basically did the same thing, but in recent years it's been time for Jed Hoyer to sit and listen to Boog Sciambi ask 4,000 word questions and say, "I think that's right."
A relatively recent addition to this panel is Carter Hawkins. Back when Jed was the GM to Theo's president of baseball operations, Jed knew his place. He never got asked questions and he never talked.
Carter won't shut the fuck up. Just because they put your name on the sign behind you and give you a mic doesn't mean that anybody actually wants to hear what you have to say. I mean, that's what podcasts are for!
Anyway, last year he kept trying to force this analogy about how many "hats" a GM has to wear. Given his weird hairline, he may have meant it literally. Anyway, this year, he kept talking about "tools in our toolbag," but he did change it up to "tools in our toolbox" a couple of times, just to show what handy guy he is. I mean, he is a tool, so it all makes sense.
Jed came out this year wearing a Bears 2 jersey, clearly to suck up to the Bears' fans in attendance. But he actually did have a story to go with it. It's not a DJ Moore jersey. I assumed it was a game worn Paul Edinger one, because it would fit Jed. But it turns out it's a Brian Hoyer jersey.
Jed explained that when he was with the Red Sox, Brian Hoyer was the backup to Tom Brady with the Patriots, and Jed claims the media kept mixing the first names of the "Hoyers" up. And so, when Brian Hoyer came to the Bears to back up Jay Cutler (and Matt Barkley) in 2016 and Jed was with the Cubs still backing up Theo, he got that jersey.
I like that Jed equates himself with Brian, who is likely most famous in the NFL for making Bill Belichick's head explode when he lost a game to the Chiefs when he called a timeout that the Patriots didn't have.
There was a nice moment when a Special Olympian came up to the question microphones to thank Jed for a day last year when he arranged for her to spend the day with the Cubs interacting with players and coaches. For all of the shit I give Jed, he is universally regarded to be a very good guy. In fact, when he and Theo worked together, Jed was the "normal" one that people could actually talk to.
Anyway, that spurred Jed to tell a story about when he was a kid being dropped off by his dad at Reds' spring training on a Florida trip to just be at the park all day alone when he was 13, and Barry Larkin saw him and brought him back to the clubhouse to hang out. It's a cool story, and Jed told the exact same one last year.
You'll be shocked to know that Crawley was the first fan to ask a question. It was mostly a soliloquy about what will the Cubs do when most of the team leaves as free agents next year. I'm not sure what Jed's non-memorable answer was, but I know he didn't come out and say, "Well, we're not bringing Ian Happ back," which is all I wanted to hear.
A fan called out Carter for his ludicrous comment at the trade deadline last year about having a "responsibility to the 2032 Cubs." Carter had also blathered on about how sacred every season is, so the question was how can those two things be true at the same time. Are you building for now or the future, because if you try to do both, you'll inevitably fall short at both.
Guess what Carter's answer was? They're trying to do both at the same time.
Jed gave Carter credit for all of his work convincing the Ricketts and...Crane?...that not being willing to defer money in contracts was putting the Cubs at a competitive disadvantage. Well, no shit.
But we all know that Boras Corp did the heavy lifting on the deferrals in Alex Bregman's contract. Scott basically explained it to the Cubs. Maybe they can hire an intern from Scott to explain how it all works to Jed and Carter on every deal?
Can they get a table to put in front of Boog? Or a plant? Something? There are kids in the room, they don't need 45 minutes of Boog's crotch in their faces.
Boog kept saying they need to rename the session. By his stance I think he's trying to subliminally suggest, "Cubs 40-Manspread Roster Update with Jed and Crane."
Boog asked Jed if the Cubs are "done" with free agency and trades before spring training, which is not the right question. Because you got the "we're always looking to improve" answer. Just come on out and ask him if they're trying to trade Nico. It's clearly the thing on top of everybody's minds.
I'm not trying to say that the Cubs should not, under any circumstances, trade Nico. He's a nice player. He's not a great player. But you know the Cubs wouldn't trade him in a "baseball" deal, where they'd use his value to improve themselves in other areas and move Matt Shaw to second. They would salary dump Nico for nothing. And that makes zero sense.
I think it's unlikely the Cubs do it. But with this bunch, who knows?
One fan asked them if they have a player like Trey Yesavage who could start in class A and pitch for them in the World Series.
Remember gang, there are no dumb questions, but there are some dumb people who ask questions.
First off, you'd have to make the World Series for that to happen. Second, the Cubs don't really do pitching prospects.
All in all, the tone of the session was that Jed and Carter did a great job this offseason. They took a 92 win team and through shrewd maneuvering they now have a 92 win team.
Great job.
Moron the Cubs Convention
Andy Dolan
Andy Dolan
