Everything that glitters is not gold

The Cubs won't bring home a lot of individual honors this offseason, which is to expected from a thrilling second place finish that included going from a four game lead on July 6 to being nine games behind by August 15.

But one Cub was spectacular in the second half (no, not Reese McGuire). Rookie pitcher Cade Horton shut up big dopes like me who were whinging about how his lack of innings pitched over the last few...well, ever, actually...would likely smash him right into the proverbial wall sometime in July.

At the All-Star break we were thrilled by how his season was going. He was just 3-3 with a 4.45 ERA, but he'd made 10 starts (plus that stupid thing where they held him until the second inning of his debut) and he was more than holding his own.

For a pitcher his age, he was doing great.

And then when baseball resumed in the second half he said, "Hold this beer that I've only been able to drink legally for two years."

Horton made 12 starts in the second half. He was 8-1 with a ludicrous 1.03 ERA. He struck out fewer than a batter (54) per inning (61.1) but he walked just 15 and most importantly he allowed only 33 hits. Opposing batters had slashed .283/.347/.429 in the first half, which was just OK. But they didn't do shit against him in the second half. He held them to .154/.213/.234. He cut his WHIP (walks plus hits per innings pitched) nearly in half from 1.412 in the first half to .783 in the second.

A National League rookie pitcher made the All-Star team. But it wasn't Cade. It was the rubber faced giraffe in Milwaukee, Jacob Misericorida.

One of them is going to win Rookie of the Year.

Well, it's not going to be the one who went 1-2 with a 5.86 ERA in the second half.

The rubber faced giraffe pitched very well in the postseason. He pitched 12 innings over three appearances in two rounds, striking out nine and allowing two runs.

But, if the Cubs had Horton they'd have likely beaten the Brewers, because unlike the rubber faced giraffe, Cade would have made real starts because he's not a freak show gimmick like the other guy.

But Cade missed the playoffs because of a very manly injury. He broke a rib.

How did he do it? Did the Oklahoma roughneck do it wrasslin' a steer?

Uh...he coughed really hard.

Oh, whatever.

Cade's competition for the award isn't the giraffe, it's Barves catcher Drake Baldwin.

He's a nice player. He hit 19 homers, drove in 80 runs and had an .810 OPS in his first season. And it helped Atlanta so much they finished 20 games behind the Phillies in the NL East.

The Cubs will also win some Gold Gloves. They really are an excellent fielding club. In fact, they have a plus defender at first base (Michael Busch), second base (Nico Hoerner), shortstop (Dansby Swanson), third base (Matt Shaw), catcher (Carson Kelly) right field (Kyle Tucker) and center field (Petecrow Armstrong.) That's all of the positions, right?